My flying diary

Flying diary pulak.. it sounds like i m an aviator or steward.

The night before I started spending 30+ hours on flight and transit, I was not allowed to sleep though I was extremely tired after doing 5 finals in 1 week.

Thanks to Chin Heng, I was allowed to stay at his apartment after moving out from the dorm. However, the price was that he didnt allow me to sleep. We played RISK, it's a board game and I lose badly. haha...

Mei Wah, Jing Yean, Chia yi, and Chin Heng....

Mei Wah, Chin Heng and I are 慢热族。 可是三个在一起就很热了。。

Outside his apartment, before I went to the airport.

This is Lincoln Airport, a super small one.

Minneapolis Airport, big big big.....

My Northwest flights in Tokyo

Narita Airport, Tokyo. A lot of cute steward and stewardess..

Singapore Airport, I saw malays with tudung there. Almost home.. And, I watched Dream Girls while waiting for my next flight from 1.30am to 6am... gosh...

KLIA --- I m home, Nasi Lemak!!!

Dump him before u are dumped!

Take a Bow - Rihanna

1

Compare to the song Take a Bow by Leona Lewis and Take a Bow by Madonna, i prefer Rihanna's Take a Bow...

1

Though these 3 songs have the same name, their mood and meanings are totally different. I prefer Rihanna's Take a Bow since it's pleasing to listen to it. And, it talks about how cool one should be when his or her partner was caught cheating.

1

1

1

P/S: Nasi lemak, prawn mee, rendang kambing, 肉粽, char kuey teo, tom yam kung are mine..

回家。。

快回家了。。

i m flying from Linc0ln -> Minneapolis -> Tokyo -> Singapore -> Kuala Lumpur...

Feel free to track me if u can.



Going home countdown: 9 hours

城市寂寞

城市很喧哗，也很寂寞

我快回到这城市了，
当时捕捉这照片的心情，与现在的大大不同了

花了多少时间，再度翻阅储存的照片
花了多少勇气，回想起照片中的心情
花了多少决心，按下了关键性的按键
花了多少心思，把过去变成永远回忆

当回忆昇华时，我将会笑看那些曾经，还有忘不了的过往。



Going home countdown: 3 days

当。。。

当爱情走远，
我开始长大
我变得没有过度自我
我慢慢看清自己的剧本角色

当情绪收敛，
我不会失落
我更不会为别人流泪
我不再随便为别人开心难过

当时光流逝，
我开始改变
我习惯了一个人生活
我能够没有任何思念地入睡

当回忆风干，
我不再徘徊
我懂我不能原地停留
我尝试收拾心情等待更好的

当感觉放空，
我学会放松
我不管身边来来往往
我看见的只有自己和那影子

当前者再现，
我看见过去
我懂得珍惜现在的它
我更后悔于当时幼稚的举动

当一切还原，
我学会了什么？



Going home countdown: 4 days

从不后退

2

2

我从新留意到了这首歌

是你当时把它推介给我

真的很轻快却有些感伤
我很喜欢其中一段歌词
这段歌词实在是太帅了

向爱过的人放话好厉害

懦弱的我却从没尝试过

22

2

Someday
I'm gonna run across your mind

Don't worry, I'll be fine

I'm gonna be alright

While you're sleeping with your pride

Wishing I could hold you tight

I'll be over you

And on with my life

You' ll think of me by Keith Urban

2

2

我从不撕破脸皮说我后悔

因为我讨厌看见嚣张的脸

我郑重宣明，我不会后悔

2

2

2

2

Going home countdown: 6 days remaining

来不及的

我来不及努力，因为时间匆匆流逝
我来不及可惜，因为往事已成回忆
我来不及感叹，因为曾经已是过去
我来不及开心，因为我已开始失落
我来不及记起，因为回忆汹涌侵袭
我来不及报歉，因为没人愿意关心
我来不及放下，因为我还是那个我

我来不及了。。。
我是天秤男
我很慢热，很闷骚，什么事都往心里藏。
想找个人和我分担，只是我不擅于表达自己。

嘴巴贱，眼光犀利，总能拐弯抹角批评别人，让大家开心。
可是，我却似乎不懂得万万全全地表达自己的内心情绪。

昨晚的自以为是，勇敢尝试，而我才发觉我仍然还在原地徘徊。

如果一切是气球，
我愿意张开双手，
让过去渐渐走远，
让内心感觉作主，
没有束缚，没有牵挂，更没有感叹。



Going home countdown: 8 days

I love the sun

I am so happy that I can wear only a polo tee without jacket. The sun is here, it's so warm out there...

This pic was taken in the stadium of my university.. We passed by this place everytime we had our lunch in the athlete's dining area. I would say the food there is so much better than anywhere else.

With the great weather, of coz what we should do is shopping. We went shopping today in Southepoint.

One of my favorite food in the US - Mexican Restaurant, Chipotle's Fajita Burito. It's hot, filling, delicious... I think this food chain can do well in Malaysia since there's not much Mexican restaurant in Malaysia and the food is hot, which is great for Malaysians.

I spent a lot today, mainly for others...

I bought 2 old navy t-shirts for my naughty nephews, a lancome miracle magic perfume for my sis (she has been hinting it directly since last year), 1 shirt for muka tembok fren (sonnic) who asked for a gift before i offered that, 2 American Eagle perfumes for my hot chick frens, 2 shorts and a clinique face scrub for myself.

Also, chia yi's and my ipod touch-es are here today. However, life sucks.

Since my ipod touch is here before the silicone case reaches me, i decided not to use it... It's like having someone really hot (eg. Adriana Lima for men or lesbians, Andrea Lundin for girls or gays) ready to sleep with u, but oopss... u r out of condoms.

C' est la vie...

P/S: Spend lesser, do more charity like helping me financially. wahahaaa Guess I will hate the sun when I m back

Going home countdown: 9 days

Spring picnic at Warren's house

"Welcome home, sir," pink-leg maid (Ling Huey)

A bunch of Actuarial Science students posing in front of our program head, Warren Luckner's house.

Our cute, humorous and friendly Warren was giving away free gift cards.. He is really good and kind in grading our papers last semester.

I'm looking forward to be in his class again.

Of course, this little girl gained more attention than anyone except the pink legs. She is my Actuarial Science instructor, Sue's daughter.

In the whole afternoon, we were basically busy taking picture with her. How about the pink legs?

I did. I was acting shy, sitting next to the pink legs (Ling Huey's)

I guess her legs gained more attention than her face and height that day.

Going home countdown: 11 days

春天不叫春

延续我大胆白痴，乱说话的个性
今天我又要乱来了

最近这几个星期，每天都觉得好累
生理时钟完全倒翻了

生理上更是出了很大的问题

先说我之前的感冒久久未愈
医生阿姨说我可能有花粉症
春天到了，处处是美得让人能神魂颠倒的花朵
也难怪花粉到处飘。。
看来明年春天又有得受了
幸好新的敏感感冒药有些帮助

另一个问题。。最近，本人好像停机了
哈哈。。看来大家肯定看到这里肯定吓傻了
该不会把昨天的隔夜饭也一起喷出来吧

对，本大爷，再此宣布，最近性欲频频愈下。。
看来是太忙了，加上成绩的打击。。

哈哈。。好可怜的我。
往好方面想，过度纵欲也不好，
看来本人还是好好地吃素吧。。



Going home countdown: 12 days

C.S.I.

This is how pathetic and cheap a student studying abroad can be.. Help them. Donate money to me pls. USD50 a month saves lives. haha.. (Clarification: I am not the person in the pic above)

This vending machine is so stupid and funny that anyone can just stuck his or her hand in to take any drinks that his or her hand can reach... So far, we only made it to the bottom row of the vending machine.

Haha.. when I told my family about this.. They were stunned that those friends I met here are so cheap. haha.. What my sister told me was "you guys should have done this to the ipod vending machine at Macy's in Chicago.."

Guess I won't be able to blog about this if anyone of us did that in Chicago.

I am a good boy so I don't.



Going home countdown: 16 days

我还记得

我还记得 - 梁静茹

我还记得那年倾盆大雨
狼狈奔跑穿越几条街
握紧的双手为爱的不顾一切

易桀齐作曲。。超欣赏他。

最近疯狂地迷上这首歌
整首歌，满满的初恋幸福回忆

那是一种找不回的感觉，
一点羞涩，
一点尴尬，
还有一点点的期待。

那就是初恋。。
只有老人家明白（好老气）。

最近，我好像真的回到了最初的自己
那么的简单，
那么的平淡，
那么的自然。

不是每个人都能够让我有这种感觉


going home countdown: 17 days

重新定义

omaha old market的照片，感觉不够。。

想起当时刚到这里，很多事情都得重新定义。
自己的心态当然也一样。

最近，似乎找回了最纯真的自己。。

一个人的上进心
远远超越一个人的外貌，年龄，或身高
发现上进心是种让人无法抵挡的魅力

想念两个人共同的梦想

想念为彼此加油的幸福

初恋，我来啦。。。（花痴）



going home countdown: 19 days

Looking back at my old pics...

Looking back at my old pics, I found these... When my face was stil slim. haha...

It was during the fashion show of the Mass Comm Day at Inti College Subang Jaya. Though I was not a mass comm student, I was invited by the head of program to help up in modelling probably because of my height and he knew I was a metro.. haha...

Since it was sponsored by Giordano, so we were offered to choose any shirts available in the store we liked. So I picked this... my favorite of all 3 styles I demonstrated that day.

Weird pose of standing plus terrible facial expression.

No matter how many times I watch this video clip, I still burst out laughing like hell...

We were trained by a student who was a part-time model at my college. Since I was a lil hunched back, I tried so hard to straightened my back that day.. and, then it turned out to be something like this ---> robot walk.

P/S: Never do things that you like but not good at. haha

Going home countdown: 20 days

My job

This is where I work, or probably more accurately, where I earn money for watching youtube shows, as a residents hall desk assistant. Oh ya, I was watching Project Runway that night while chatting and checking other's blogs. So, Basically, my workload is very heavy.

I've got the best job on campus according to my friends. The reasons are:

1. I have a super friendly and nice supervisor.

2. The work load is so HEAVY (Youtube-ing, chatting, blogging, tv, ringing...)

3. I get paid for watching Youtube shows and tv shows.

4. This is the only on campus job that provides tv to its student workers.

5. I work alone on the shift most of the time.

What I hate the most is doing mails and packages which includes logging, forwarding, and checking them against rosters. But I do like to slack in the mailroom.

Behind my desk is a stupid board open for art work display... but then, it has been totally messed up by some stupid University Football slogan, "GO BIG RED!" and so it's red...

To be ashamed of, I was the one who was asked to put those things on due to my height..

As you know Americans like to bullshit, you gotta be hypocrite, talk to them and even ask "how's it going?", "what do you think bout the decorations on the board?", "do you think it looks better?" no matter how bad ur mood is...

So when my supervisor asked me, "do you think the board looks better now?"

I was like.. "Yea, I like it... It's so much better now. What a great idea!"

What I was thinking was actually "GO BIG RED! , here RED, there RED, why don't you put your used tampon or red Victoria's Secret bras on..." haha....

Working at nite is great since nobody will be around, bothering me with stupid questions and requests..

Since nobody is around, then I can cam whore... haha. Big face pulakk.. Blame it on the fattening American food.

回归简单

工作后一个人吃午餐
感觉特别写意，吃得特别慢

我选了靠窗的位子
一个人望着窗外春天的气息
翠绿的草地，潮湿的天气
我似乎回到了最原始的我

一切觉得特别清新，没有压力
至少我并不拖欠谁了
我开始说服自己单身的自在
我开始感受身边的来来往往

告诉自己，我并不差
总有一天，我会找到

一个简单，舒服，安全的对象
一段简单，包容，自在的关系

想要简单其实就很不简单了。。

但，我相信你应该在不远处吧。。。

A series of dirty jokes

This semester, chin heng sits next to me in the boring Statistics class. He swears he is not going to sleep in the class this semester. However, he doesnt concentrate at all. What he has been doing is telling me a series of dirty jokes that really help us to kill time.



Joke 1:

阴茎要求加薪的二大原因：

1。每天要在极深极潮湿的地方工作
2。每天要做得呕吐才能收工



Joke 2:

问题：一天，小猫和公鸡在桥上相遇。小猫跌入水，公鸡兴奋地飞了起来。故事的意义是什么？

答案：A cock is happy when there's a wet pussy.



Joke 3:

问题：What's common between a Rubik's cube and a dick?
(Avoid lame answer like: Wayne likes to play with both of them.)

答案：The longer you play, the harder they are.



Dad and mum, don't worry. I m still a hard-working boy in the class as u can c. haha... And, I m innocent. I don't understand most of the jokes anyway (believe it or not). haha...

But, it's a pic taken last semester. haha. not now.

Going home countdown: 22 days remaining

I've got a child!

I am currently single but I have a child, from now on!

The pic above was used in previous post: 你的一餐，别人的一个月饭碗 (about 2 yrs ago in 2006). It was a poster I created for my presentation and I got the highest grade for the poster. yeah...

I can't believe I am so into charity now. Thinking of working for 3 hours on campus can actually sponsor a child for a month (RM50), I decided to go for it.

The benefits of sponsoring a child:
1. U help a child, a family, and probably the community
2. U can hav a child though u noe u cant have one in a short while or u can never have one (it applies to non-heterosexuals, transvertives, monks, and those with reproduction problems)
3. The responsiblities of raising a child is so much heavier than sponsoring one.
4. It makes u feel better though u often spend a lot like me. Seriously, it eases my guilt of spending too much on shopping.
5. U can tell ppl that u r kind. haha... It's so useful in impressing someone u like.



An Indonesian child, named Albertus, from singkawang, Kalimantan, Indonesia has been assigned to me. He is 11 years old and his favorite subject is Math. Same interest huh...

I should also give some credits to the helpful services provided by World Vision staff in following up my matter since my form was actually lost since I sent it from the US. Knowing that I m not in Malaysia, the staff even sent an electronic copy of the child's profile to me while the official mail is on its way to my home in KL.


P/S: Eat lesser, Drink lesser, smoke lesser, shop lesser, sponsor a child at RM50/month!

把回忆风干

去年十八岁，人生中第一次经历四季


那个春天
我们相遇，一切犹如刚萌芽的花朵，等待绽放的日子。迫不及待，可是却又害怕过度心急而破坏了好事。一切都是美好的。。



那个夏天
天气炽热，温暖的阳光把大家的热情都激起，奋不顾身为彼此付出。
沙滩，高原，郊外，所有一起进行的活动都显得格外甜蜜。我们珍惜每一分每一秒的陪伴，尝试为彼此掏出更多的时间。
那个夏天似乎特别短暂，还记得你邀我到场，看你驻唱，你点了孙燕姿的我怀念的给我，更提到我只要一听到这首歌的兴奋表情，而你则会故意地把音量降低，不让我听。
还记得吗？窝心的小卡片，特别要来的易桀齐签名CD，预购的孙燕姿逆光CD，我们约好却又错过的孙燕姿逆光签唱会。



那个秋天
落叶轻飘，慢慢地覆盖在原本翠绿的草地上，把无限活力隐藏于心底。
离别的哀愁，无法释怀。刚开始的灿烂留学生活比不过每天朝思暮想的思念。我的生日，满满的祝福与感动的庆祝也只能透过视频来传递，没有肢体接触，更没有温暖窝心的拥抱。我不埋怨，因为我知道你比我更想一起度过这特别的日子。每天都期待回国日子的到来。



那个冬天
天空飘起白雪，让原本期待冬天的我开始改观了。我讨厌冬天的冷漠。
不断延伸的争吵，到彼此接近崩溃的失落。我的chicago之旅，免不了的长途电话争吵。被识破的谎言，让一切到了一个无法收拾的地步。疲累的身躯饱受冷风侵袭，心灵创伤让自己再也提不起劲来面对这一切。

　　接近零下的天气
　　强迫自己穿着短袖上衣
　　冷到不能呼吸
　　却怕穿上毛衣
　　又想起了你　
　　－　許哲珮　白色婚礼 　

你送的外套，我真的不太敢穿了。。
好多的误会，好多的外来因素，我们分开了，在这个冷漠的冬天里。
不敢接你的来电，更不敢再听到关于你的任何消息，我很害怕。。

　　我怀念的是无话不说
　　我怀念的是一起做梦
　　我怀念的是争吵以后还是想要爱你的冲动
　　我记得那年生日 也记得那一首歌　
　　记得那片星空 最近的右手　
　　最暖的胸口
　　谁记得　谁忘了
　　－　孙燕姿　我怀念的

而孙燕姿的我怀念的，如今句句都是要害。
好多解不开的谜底，但我还是没勇气开口。



这个春天
花开了，我看开了吗？



我决定把回忆风干 ，因为我知道已结束了。你也已找到了另一个人了，而我也不该在原地游荡了。。

残酷社会

最近，从源那里发现了这部电影 - bangkok love story

让我感触最深的莫过于残酷的社会歧视

爱滋病患者的身体一天比一天每况愈下，内心挣扎似乎无人完全了解。知道自己患病已经是一个天大的考验，学着看开，学着接受事实的痛苦更是痛不欲生。

片中男配角自小被双性恋继父强暴，无辜感染爱滋病，却遭社会歧视与排斥，更时常遭路人毒打。就连买个事物，摊贩也不愿意从他手上拿钱，只冷淡地要他把钱放入空盘子里。社会真的那么冷淡吗？面对需要关心与帮助的病患，不但不伸出援手，反而落井下石。

成为他生命里唯一寄托的，则是他寸步不离的国外名胜明信片。他哥哥曾答应会带他到外国生活，让他不再忍受众人的凌辱。他朝思暮想，等着等着。。。

结果，愿望还是成空了。他一个人在病床上，把一只只的打架鱼放入一个鱼缸里，看着它们自相残杀，直到最后只剩下唯一的生存者。

他说：“这社会，只有强者生存。”

隔天，他自杀了。。




社会歧视比任何疾病来得更可怕残忍
平等地对待身边没个人吧。。。

仰望幸福

忽然发现身边幸福的人不少。。

jing yean
- 他为人随便，凡事总能轻松以待
- 他为人专一（应该是吧），还有温柔的未来医生女友
- 他嘴巴甜，总能哄的身边的人开开心心
- 他为人爱家，曾经影响我最深的一句话是
-----“我未来的事业不一定要大红大紫，但肯定要有的幸福快乐的家”
- 让我觉得他超幸福的，当然就是即将有我真么好的室友
- 这种种的理由，让我票选他为我见过最幸福的人

whitney
- 她为人爱家，家里是她最向往的目的地
- 无论离家多远，她几乎每晚都会跟大马的妈妈聊天
- 她个性爽朗直率，大笑姑婆的个性让大家苦笑不得

ida
- 她为人糊涂，比别人慢半拍，很多事情都摸不透，应该是好事吧
- 她傻乎乎，更不懂别人的明争暗斗，省了很多麻烦
- 她任何事情都听哥哥的劝告，他就是她最好的知己
- 别人眼中单纯的她，其实比很多人来得更成熟

chia yi
- 为人智商超高，领悟力也超高，让人羡慕不已
- 为人逍遥自在，认为既来之，则安之，从来不害怕未来
- 他有远见，走的每一步都为自己未来铺路



从不同的角度去欣赏每个人，人人都是幸福的。

就医了

病了快一星期，身边朋友家人不断地劝说我看医生。

咳嗽，咳得快死了。我还真怕会被痰淹死。好像肺痨病人般，日咳夜咳，还吵醒了室友，小弟深感抱歉。

我懒惰，固执，害怕，
直到大家都放弃劝说我了，我终于自己到大学的health center去。

护士阿姨为我量体重，我又重了两磅，这回糟了。。还以为大病一场，身子必定立刻收下来。可是，反而重了两磅。也好，这样回国时，爸妈看见我肥嘟嘟的脸才不会担心我。人还是乐观点好。。

医生说我的喉咙太红了，还是作个喉咙病菌测试好。超恶心，被人用一根扁扁的木材和两根棉花棒插入喉咙，有类似作呕的感觉。

被人插的感觉还真怪。
幸好，一切没事。

所有的测试费用都是大学保险包了，除了罐可爱的药（$9.20)。在health center，durex避孕套每个十仙。好便宜。。应该买来，回马大量批发。

十二小时吃一颗，让我的呼吸道完全顺畅，咳嗽也少了。

可是，让我整个人摇摇晃晃，好晕，还是睡觉去吧。




P/S:真不知今晚的课和工作怎么办。。一阵晕眩。。

我病倒了

几天的奔波，我病倒了

从lincoln到des moines的三小时车程
不错过每一分每一秒见到好友的时间，
通宵聊天，再累也不管了
仅于三小时的睡眠
再从des moines到lincoln的三小时车程
我累得快崩溃了，我病倒了

忙着聊天与测验的温习，
我只睡了几小时，我病倒了

喉咙痛，头疼，咳嗽，全身没力。。
熬出病来，测验也好像考得不太好，我病倒了

我好想家，我病倒了

愚人节，我病倒了

Utada Hikaru - Final Distance

My favorite lyrics:

My principle is not to try

But I would do it for you

I wanna be with you now

P/S: Clips with English subtitles are available on YouTube

瞬间疑问

我很爱城市夜景，也很害怕落幕后的孤寂。

今晚又一个人，想了好多。。

有人问我：“为什么你那么没自信了？”

他并不时第一次问我了。

短短的几个月，他问了我好多次。

可是今晚同样的问题却让我想了好久。

认识他的时间也不算短，重复的疑问终于让我对自己怀疑了。

以前的我，真的很有自信吗？

怎么我从没发觉？

现在的我，真的有很自卑吗？

身边的人们，你们有发现吗？

我不懂。只是，最近心情都是蓝蓝的。

积极运动健身，为了什么？

每当我问自己时，还真的没面子回答。

我好像个傻瓜，为了那些不可能的可能而努力。

月经来了

本人经期缓缓逼近

症状如下

1。情绪失常
- 心情忽起忽落，找不到平衡点
- 偶尔傻笑，吓坏朋友（chia yi)
- 偶尔撒娇，让人呕吐
- 积极于运动，不知坏了哪根筋

2。食欲不定
- 早餐吃得比平时多，午餐却没胃口，觉得超反胃
- 上完夜课后，吃ida为我带走的三明治，忽然觉得好幸福
- 原来有朋友的帮忙和关心，食欲会变好

3。睡眠不好
- 昨晚写部落格到三点，却睡不着
- 今早八点半，闹钟没响就起了
- 跌破眼镜，春假后开学第一天，在朋友群中第一个到食堂用餐

4。心跳超快
- 想起了很多事
- 期待好多好多
- 想念了好多好多
- 春假后第一天工作就得报警
- 不知所措地跟警察阿姨交待我不懂的

5。身手敏捷
- 下班后，不哈拉，第一时间赶回房
- 不安让我动作变快
- 深怕会被我告发的人用乱枪扫射


今天leona lewis CD - Spirit 到了，听着 bleeding love 还不让我月经血流不止？

工作惊魂

除了月经，让我大量出血的当然是今天可怕的工作。

原本超爱当夜班的我（觉得没人没事做），一如往常边聊天边赚钱，突然电话响了。某栋楼的舍监要我赶快报警。吓死了。。一开始还以为是恶作剧，慢慢地还是害怕了，赶快报警。。

结果警察阿姨把我问的哑口无声。
为什么会起争执打架？ 不懂
谁和谁打？ 不懂
有多少人打？ 不懂
救命啊。。

超害怕，找Alice聊。他竟说：“没事的，没抢就没事了。”
我全身毛发立刻竖起，头脑有好多恐怖画面。。

要是有枪不是大件事吗？

那我这个front desk assistant就会被问话吗？、

要是他们争执到我这来，我不就被乱枪扫射，血染大地（比月经还多）？

啊。。。 可怕啊。。。（Alice，你懂不懂安慰人啊？！）

交班后，赶快交待清楚，拔腿就跑。


快疯了。。 好可怕紧张的一份文员工作。 只不过是赚你少少钱，需要那么样吓我吗？！

麻辣锅

吴非的重庆麻辣锅 --- 除了辣 ，还是辣。。

我本人还是较喜欢tom yam酸辣汤
酸酸辣辣，十分开胃

吃了麻辣锅，要干嘛？
当然是拉肚子。。。

拉了要干嘛？
继续拉。。。

拉完后干嘛？
再拉吧。。。

还是少吃微妙，毕竟麻辣锅太油腻了
别因为口腹之欲而坏了瘦身瘦脸大计

莫名其妙

我很莫名其妙

我很积极
我一个人游泳去
因为我想把身体肩膀练好

我很开心
我的脑海不是空白的
因为我开始有激励自己的目标

我很想家
我想要拨电回家
可是我昨天已拨过了

我很无奈
我明天又得上课了
因为春假放完了

我很安慰
我每天期待的照常发生
因为我还在等待。。。

P/S：很害怕却又很希望能快回家，快毕业，快点让他人知道我在想什么

看不透的

宝特瓶，握在手中

你懂里面是什么吗？
能够为你解渴的水？
或让你死亡的毒药？

好多东西即使握在手中也能流失
更何况双手与水还隔着一层薄膜

你看得透宝特瓶，
可是你看不见水中有什么；
当你说你看得很透很了解它；
你真的这么认为吗？
你不是他，又怎么知道他在想什么？

猜测别人想什么真的好累
每天的对话都像是心理战
好想能大声说出自己的想法
好想要身边我爱的都爱我
好想要身边我恨的都远离我

最近头脑想了好多
脑海中总有不听话的思绪
缠绕自己让我胡思乱想
我不断告诉自己不要乱想
可是画面不断闪过
我又傻傻地对着空气
看着别人看不见的画面
傻笑了，失落了

告诉自己，一切好像很遥远
可是我要努力，为了自己曾经的幻想
我要成功地为自己投资
毕竟资优股市需要本钱

我要努力把肩膀练好
我要努力念书，到新加坡发展
找到自己终生投资的资优股


握在手中的水也许看不清，
但我相信时间能验证它。