Monday, July 17, 2006

a sudden worry bout my future

today after the prep course class, dav, beng hui n i went to sunway pyramid for an american edu fair. knowing that drake U, nebraska lincoln U booths ll b there, i was quite excited to check out more bout the course that i intended to study although i was kinda tired n couldnt wait to go home.

as v reached there n parked our car, a guard on his 'vehicle' that is used to send customers from their cars to lifts approached us. wow! this was really my first time of taking this type of 'vehicle'. anyway, it looked more like a vehicle that golfers use. haha...

as v reached the convention centre, i was disappointed as chia yi told me tat there were no advisors from US at all, those standing there were only students that were here during their summer break. and, surprisingly, i saw khai au (my senior with the same major of mine who left for US in august 2005) standing at the booth of drake U. he looked thinner. haha. mayb life in US was too hard. terrible... GENIUSSSS, he passed the first 2 professional papers. GOD!!! i was really proud of him.

however, knowing tat he has passed the first 2 papers, a sudden worry bout my future emerged in my mind. ll i pass? mayb not even the first paper. every sat n sun, i go to coll for a 9-1pm class jz for tat first professional paper preparation course but i was so blur almost all the time. i dun think i can pass it in nov when i actually take the exam. PLS, pray for me.

therefore, throughout the whole day, i was stressed, thinking of how lazy i was these few weeks. i shud really start studying as the acc test n assgn due was coming, final was coming too.

after taking a long 'nap' from 6-11pm, i woke up n planned to study. u jz finished attending the function n u shared ur excitements n happiness with me. after few smses, u could know tat i wasnt really happy mayb due to the stress aroused from unavoidable comparisons. i was touched, u could know how i feel at that moment when i didnt even mention bout 1 single thing regarding my feeling. Dear, u r jz too caring.

tonite, b4 i started to do my revision, i sent an email to u, telling u my future plan. mayb u cant understand when u read it, but dun worry, all i need is time. hopefully angels ll bless us so tat all my efforts pay.

dun worry bout the future, who knows mayb the nx minute v ll get bombed n everything jz gone? let's treasure the current moment v hav.

tanya chua's song - BEAUTIFUL LOVE : "zhe ge shi jie sui shi dou yao beng ta 这个世界随时都要崩塌, wo mei you qi ta de yuan wang 我没有其他的愿望, jia ru ming tian jiang xiao shi le 假如明天将消失了, cheng xian zai wo ai zhe 乘现在我爱着, zhi xiang ji de bei ni bao zhe wen rou de gan shou 只想记得被你抱着温柔的感受, love's beautiful"
english version : "this world might collapse anytime, i dun hav any other hopes. if tomorrow ll disappear, while i m still in love, i jz wanna remember the feeling of being hugged by u. love's beautiful~"

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